"Can you make that grey more cheery?"
- (via clientsfromhell)
"I feel like the placement of the image throws the whole page off balance. Can we move the image one pixel to the right?"
- (via clientsfromhell)
"How much bigger is 10 millimeters compared to 8 millimeters?"
- (via clientsfromhell)
"I am going to fax over some pictures that I took from the internet."
- (via clientsfromhell)


Client: My fiancé and I are unhappy with the engagement photos you sent us.

Me: What’s wrong with them?

Client: We’re wearing sweat pants in them!

Me: But that’s what you wore to the shoot. I asked you on the day if you wanted to change into something more appropriate and you said no.


I am a (female) fashion designer. I create unique dresses, mostly for cocktail parties and weddings.

Me: So here is my quote for the cocktail gown that we discussed last week.

Client: Thanks… I understand the lines for fabric and other material, but what is the last line about?

Me: That’s…


Client: Why would you assume I wanted the columns to be vertical?

Me: I - I’m sorry, how did you want them?

Client: Obviously, I wanted horizontal columns.

Me: Like rows?

Client: Exactly like rows!


A client and I were discussing which photos to upload to his website.

Client: I’ll get all the photos to you ASAP so you can edit them as agreed.

Me: Sounds great.

After five hours, I still hadn’t received any photos, so I rang the client.

Me: Hi - have you got those photos?


"If I print this email, will you scan it and email it for me?"
- (via clientsfromhell)


Client:  I need you to create an interactive planning app on the web page, like Google calendar.

Me: No problem, we can use JavaScript to achieve that

Client: No, don’t use JavaScript.

Me: Why not?

Client: We don’t use scripts.

Me: You want a fully interactive app without scripts?

Client: Yeah. I don’t trust scripts. The word bugs me.

"Just force people to like my website. You do design, it shouldn’t be hard."
- (via clientsfromhell)


From an animated YouTube series I was a voice actor on:

Client: Hey, I just wanted to let you know that [a fellow cast member] killed himself last night.

Me: Oh my God! That’s terrible!

Client: It’s okay, I’ve sent out emails to potential replacements, and we should be back on track…


Client: “I don’t want to download it. Just give it to me over the phone.”

Me: “It’s a computer program, I can’t give it to you over the phone. I can mail you a DVD, or I can tell you how to safely download it over the internet.”

Client: “Look, I’m not downloading anything, and I’m not getting…


Client: I threw out that black pen, it was out of ink.

Me: What black pen?

Client: The one that was lying on your tablet.

Me: You threw out my $150 Wacom pen?

Client: I tried writing with it and it didn’t work. It must’ve been out of ink.

(via liar-liar-pants-on-smyre)